My Latest Adventure

After the journey to pick up my credit cards, I am home safe and sound. Before I left home, I received three other texts/calls from community members who became aware of my lost cards and wanted to help. One person, Geovanna, from the drumming group, said her friend, Rita, found the cards. I’m not sure how, but Geovanna said she remembered me from past times. That surprised me because I think we only met once at drumming a couple of years ago. In any event, she called to tell me my cards were at La Casa de Paz. I already knew that due to the initial call from the library. Geovanna offered directions. She was very concerned when I said I planned to walk there, but I assured her I was fine. She offered to call me a cab and act as a translator if needed. Amazing.

Okay break here…going out to dinner for Nancy and Kathy’s BD.

Okay, I’m back. So, I’ll finish the first story and then continue with dinner.

So…I set out on my walk to La Casa de Paz. I walked past Alto Dorado and Gago, as instructed by Geovanna. I then turned left, as instructed. I was told to go to the end of the road, and there I would find La Casa de Paz. The road looked questionable at first glance. It was a narrow, gravel road that did not look important enough to have a Casa de Paz. I stopped immediately at the gate of an elderly couple working outside in their garden and asked them if La Casa de Paz was at the end of this road. No. They told me it was on the other side of the highway, a left after Alto Dorado. Apparently, Geovanna gave me directions coming from the south.

I crossed the highway and headed back in the direction from which I came. As I approached Alto Dorado, Nancy and Kathy pulled up. Nancy was dropping Kathy off (this is where she lives). I asked them if they knew where Casa de Paz was located. Nancy thought she did. So she and I took the left, meandered a bit, but with the help of some local construction workers, we were pointed in the right direction.

We finally found the building. Nancy turned to pull into the parking lot, and the right front of her car went right into a ditch. I was going to go inside to ask for help, but I couldn’t open the door. We were in that deep. Nancy was trying to go in reverse, to no avail. The grinding of her tires brought a gentleman outside. He stood and assessed the situation for a bit and then, almost like magic, three other men showed up. Two of them got into the back seat behind the driver’s side. Another put what looked like a railroad tie under the right front tire and then Nancy was able to gain traction and pull her car out of the ditch.

This is the second ditch dive I’ve experienced. The first time was with Adrianna two years ago when we didn’t see the massive hole in front of Otto’s restaurant and mistook it for an empty parking spot. In both of these instances, I have been amazed by the quick response of the locals. Both times, we were out of the ditch in less than five minutes.

Once out of the ditch, I told Nancy she could leave, and I would get a taxi home. We were pressed for time because we were all going to dinner to celebrate Nancy and Kathy’s birthdays. I went inside to collect my credit card packet. At the door, as I entered, sat an elderly woman. She reminded me of the elderly women who sit outside the bathrooms to collect money in exchange for toilet paper. Once inside, I was given my cards but was asked to wait in order to complete the process. The elderly woman, now inside, was eating crackers from a cellophane packet. She insisted I share them with her, which I did. They were stale. The remainder of the process turned out to be my examining the packet to make sure everything was there and then having my photo taken with the agent. Very official.

I got home with just enough time to shower and dress for the birthday dinner at The Rock, which was fabulous. I was so happy that the entire gang was there. Maybe things are getting back to normal.

Counter Clockwise: Beth (in black top looking very regal), Mayra, Herta, Linda, Jerry, me, Kathy, Nancy and Betty.

Although it was Kathy’s birthday, she was the gift giver. She shared her paper art skills with us and made these lovely calendars for everyone.

I just got a call from the Boquete Library. They said they received a call from the police department saying that they have my packet of credit cards, which also included my library card. The police asked the library to track me down and let me know that they are leaving my cards at the courthouse. I didn’t even discover yet that the packet was missing. Not sure where I dropped it, but it happened either ON the bus last night, or before I got into the taxi. This is what happened:

The road I live on is basically shaped like a horseshoe. The base of the shoe is on the highway and then it leans back about 45 degrees. So it goes uphill on both sides with the peak at the top. The loop is about 10 miles. I live on the right side of the shoe, about two miles up. Picture the bus at the base of the horseshoe. The driver can choose to go left or right and then up either side. I asked once how they decide and was told that it depends on who is on the bus. Last night after dinner, I told my friends I was going to take a taxi because I didn’t want anyone trying to drive up my road in the dark. It is extremely steep, narrow and dangerous.

So, after dinner, I walked over to the taxi stand. There were none there, so I continued on to the bus stop. My bus was there, full and ready to go, so I got on. I was immediately dismayed when the driver turned left. It was quickly getting dark. I knew by taking this route, it was going to take a lot longer, and I would not be able to see my stop when it came up. It is hard enough to see in broad daylight. I asked the driver to stop and let me out.

He pulled over, and when I started to move to get off the bus, my boots (which I was carrying) and my money belt with phone fell to the floor. The guys on the bus picked everything up for me. I felt like a crazy, discombobulated old woman: boots, poles, phone, money, all out of control. I clutched everything haphazardly as I walked back to the taxi stand just a short distance away. There was a taxi there, and once in the taxi, I put “everything” back in order. What I didn’t realize is that the little rubber-band-bound packet with my credit cards and things was not there. So, now I have to get myself to the courthouse to pick it up. Not bad. It’s not too far away. It will be my walk tomorrow.

So, yesterday turned out to be a great day. I say “turned out” because it started out a bit hectic. I thought I was going to have the whole day to write and get my pages in by the end of the day, which is my deadline. I usually don’t put it off this long, but the auction has been challenging. The challenges continued Wednesday morning, so I had to push off my writing. But it turned out okay. I finished writing and submitted my pages by four o’clock, just enough time to get geared up and walk into town to meet friends for drumming and dinner, well at least dinner; drumming was over by five o’clock, which is when I arrived.

The walk in was fabulous. Not only did I feel great for having finished the writing, but there was a slight mist (bajareque) in the air, which makes for the best rainbows.

And, of course, dinner at the Fish House was fabulous. I had one of my favorites: coconut shrimp.

And here are just a couple of photos from Tuesday Market.

Okay, auction settled…so far, writing done, had a lovely chat with Kathleen and Diane on Zoom this morning. So now I can play. I still don’t have my 100-lb. paper. I order some from Amazon, so I can’t work on making cards yet. However, there is always calligraphy. 🙂

I hiked the Colebra(?) trail today with Sally Zigmund. Beautiful day. A bit muddy from last night’s rain, but overall a short, sweet hike.

I was surprised at one point to hear howler monkeys. I’ve never heard them before in Panama.

Life of the Ngöbe, laundry day at the river:

After our hike, Sally dropped me off at the dentist’s office. I lost a crown. I thought I might just have it cemented back on as I did another time while here about six years ago when it fell off. The dentist said she could do that but told me that the remaining tooth doesn’t have enough integrity to hang onto the cement for long. So, I’m going to get a new crown. I’m relatively happy that it happened here. It’s much less expensive to replace than at home. Not sure what the price is now in the US, but here it will be $500. Always somethin’.

The auction is officially over. It was supposed to have ended on Friday at 9 pm, and it did, but when I set that end time in the software, it took MY time zone, which EST! Didn’t go over well with those feverishly bidding at 8 pm CST, thinking they had another hour and having the auction shut down mid bet. It didn’t go over very well. I was shocked when I saw my winning bid notifications coming via email. I had to get into the program and figure out how to reverse that and re-open the auction, which I did. I then sent a group email and said that I had extended it through 9 pm on Sunday. That seemed to appease most people. It also allowed another $1000 to accrue in bids. I’ve been called devious. Who knows? In any event, I’m happy it’s over. Now I just need to do the wrap-up.

I’m feeling just a bit of pressure with my writing. I have two more days to submit my next 20 pages. I’ve promised myself to devote what remains of my days on Tues and Wednesday to finish. It’s a rewrite, so it shouldn’t be too hard, but I definitely am not drawn to this like I am to calligraphy or making cards. I’m looking forward to the arrival of some paper I ordered. I need 100-lb paper, and it’s not available in Boquete. So, I bit the bullet and ordered it from Amazon. It’s going to be expensive to have it delivered here because of the weight, but I REALLY need it.

We had a Zoom call yesterday night to celebrate Mickey’s 93rd birthday. The family was together at Ann’s for dinner. Denise, Randy and I joined via Zoom. Dan bought a cake from Ann Luty, our favorite baker. I’m waiting for the photos showing Mickey enjoying it. I know she will. It looked very chocolatey.

I just finished listening to the book Battle for Your Brain by Nita Farahany. She talks about how brain technology is being used to improve our lives, but she also sounds a cautionary note about our rights to privacy in regard to thought. I especially liked the chapter on what is being called Life 2.0, how we are merging with technology. Nothing new. Ray Kurzweil has been talking about it for years, but I like her citing of specific examples where it is actually being used. She gave an example of how it is being used to treat intractable depression. Electrodes are used to stimulate the part of a person’s brain that shows up as irregular on an fMRI. She tells the story of a 31-year-old woman who had the treatment done, and she said she cried out in joy when the area was initially stimulated. A year later she is still completely fine and happy – joyful.

I have to be careful. I’ve been accused of being “an amateur who believes in pop science.” But I can’t help but be excited by the possibilities of how technology can improve our lives. It has already served me in so many ways, and I don’t like to default to fear and skepticism. I agree we must be vigilant and not allow ourselves to become slaves to the technology, which is obviously happening to many, many people. But I believe that we can become more aware of our CHOICE in how we use our devices. As we move forward, we need to align the technology with our values. I trust that people like Farahany are sensitive to the ethics and will steer us in the right direction.

So, I decided to give Ash one more try, not because I feel an intense need to connect with him, but because he still owes me two classes. I asked him quite a while back if he would just give me feedback on my practice sheets in lieu of lessons, and he said he would do that. About a month ago, I sent him three or four practice sheets and heard nothing back. Two days ago, I tried again, and he sent me this. So, for anyone who thinks my work is so perfect, here’s the reality. Green marks are “good,” red needs work:

I told him that I would continue to repeat this page. I start my new classes with David Grimes on 4/1, so then I will be getting feedback from that group.

It was nice to get back to making cards again. Unfortunately, I do not have the proper card stock here, and it is not available in Boquete, so I had to order some from Amazon. In the meantime, I’m using a lighter paper, but it’s better than nothing.

I went for a hike yesterday with Barb, Barbara and Debra. We walked about 7 miles and then had lunch at Debra’s. She made a very green (mostly chard) quiche and a salad. Barb lent me a pair of hiking poles. I’m going to go back to walking down the hill and adding on some distance in town. I find that I cannot not walk. I don’t feel well if I skip it. I’m hoping my knees tolerate the hill. I’m going to stick to just every other day instead of every day. On the alternate days I’m doing the Primal Movements, which I like quite a lot.

I made the possible mistake of buying a bathroom scale. I’m five pounds over my happy weight. But what is more concerning (and I already knew this from a recent assessment), my body fat is 31.9%. For my height, this is on the border of “heavy.” I know, Kathy would be saying, “Oh, don’t worry about it!,” but, of course, I do. Not worry exactly, but I like to know that I am as healthy as possible, so I’m going to work on this. It’s just a calories thing. I’ve been eating indiscriminately, and Jerry doesn’t help. He loves baking and sharing. And I certainly don’t want to be rude.

The writing is going well. Kathie is back to work, even though Michael is still in the hospital. He’s improving, but some days he’s still confused. He thinks Kathie is his sister, instead of his wife. She’s doing well, all things considered. Unfortunately, the guy who hit Michael, is 75 years old, has a limited insurance policy and no other assets. So, they are pretty much on their own. Kathie has been very frustrated with the service they have received from Froedtert. She said that Michael was in the hospital for almost two weeks, and they still have not seen a doctor (only PA’s and NP’s) or a social worker. She’s trying to get him transferred to Waukesha Memorial. I have my next visit with her tomorrow morning. I’m hoping things will be finished before I go home.

I was happy to receive my “care package” from Michele and Kathy the other day: hairbands, stencils, moisturizer. calligraphy guidelines and more.

I should have had the card stock included. Oh well.

The auction is over tomorrow at 9 pm CST. I’m hoping there will be a surge before then. It’s a bit over 8K right now, but 10 would be even better.

https://new.biddingowl.com/LCUUCAUCTION2024

Yesterday, I watched Miss Americana, the documentary about Taylor Swift. I admit that I knew very little about her before watching this. Michele recommended it, so I thought I’d give it a watch. At first, I was quite underwhelmed. I didn’t appreciate anything unique or impressive about her as a child performer. Her voice was just so-so. Seemed like she was being pushed by doting parents. Then, as she matured as an artist and had the issue of the sexual assault to deal with, she transformed. About halfway through the film, I could see the attraction. She went through a period of emotional struggle after the court case, but rose from the ashes. I actually had goosebumps at one point when I felt the fearlessness of her personality come through. She’s definitely a force to be reckoned with. I look forward to seeing where she takes this. She is a great example of someone who is using their celebrity for the good of humankind.

Speaking of which, I just finished listening to Elon Musk by Walter Isaacson. I was happy that I had the experience of this book. Isaacson does a great job of giving us the facts about Elon’s personality. He includes extensive interviews with family, friends and intimate partners. Like Swift, I believe that Musk really wants to do something good for humanity. Unlike Swift, he has a very strong ego. He’s more concerned with competing with Bezos than saving humanity. I wish Musk would meet a good spiritual teacher somewhere along the way to give him a bit more information. He is very good at citing the first principles of the physical side of reality but seems less knowledgeable about the first principles of the spiritual side of things. He believes that he has to take humans to Mars in order to preserve human consciousness. What he doesn’t realize is that consciousness is not something that humans HAVE. We are just the latest permutation of the evolution of consciousness. If humans are wiped out here on Earth, consciousness will find some other way to manifest. It would be a beautiful thing if Musk focused more on making life better on Earth instead of messing up another planet. Okay, that’s my two cents’ worth…for now.

I love these photos that Sara posted recently on Facebook. She said, “If this doesn’t sum up my two children, I don’t know what does. Each of them has and maintains their own large tub of kinetic sand. One is order. One is chaos.”

Okay, that’s it for today. Time to move on to Spanish lessons. I just printed sample exams for the DELE (Diplomas de Español como Lengua Extranjera – Diploma of Spanish as a foreign language).

It’s been a while since I posted, but now the auction has launched, so I can relax and put my attention on other things.

https://new.biddingowl.com/LCUUCAUCTION2024

I have found a new calligraphy home. It’s called Dreaming in Script. I considered this site a while back when I wanted to take a class (pre-Ash), but the Engrosser’s Script class is offered only once a year in April. Now it is perfect timing for me. I’m going to enroll in the April 1 class, but I have to take an Intro to Calligraphy as a prerequisite. David Grimes is the teacher. I love his story. He went to school for graphic design and worked for companies like Lamborghini, but he didn’t like all the screen time. So, he started with lettering and ended up with Engrosser’s Script being his favorite. His father didn’t encourage the transition, but he didn’t try to stop him. After he studied for a while, he was offered the contract to write the certificates for the Academy Awards/Oscars. Not bad. His script is beautiful, and he seems to be a beautiful soul. Not sure if this will work, but I’ll try to post his Intro to Calligraphy video. Didn’t work, but this one is posted on YouTube, so you can at least get a sense of him.

A person from the Copperplate Script for All Facebook group friended me on Messenger, and we have been corresponding for a while. Her name is Rey Predicala. She never posts anything on the group page, but this morning she did, indeed, send me a sample of her work. I asked why she never posts her work, and she said she was “too rusty.”

Maybe a bit rusty, but not as bad as she made it sound. She is also very helpful and has given me some good pointers. She knows a lot about David Grimes classes from talking to others. So, she has been very encouraging. It’s not an inexpensive venture at $600 (for one year), but I believe it is a “you-get-what-you-pay-for” venture.

Ash told me that he would be “happy” to send me feedback on my work instead of the last two hours of class he owes me, but I haven’t heard from him in over a month. On January 6th he said, “What I forgot to tell you is you can practice basis these videos for some time and send me your work again and with comments / critiques which you saw as a change. You are always welcome to send me your work to check. No problem!” I sent him copies of my work on January 9, 13 and 15th. Not a peep. Oh, well. I guess that’s just part of my calligraphy journey.

I FINALLY went to Trivia on Tuesday. Jerry was also interested in playing, so he, Linda and I went. It’s such a fun night out. Let’s see how many questions I can remember. I’ll put the answers at the end.

What is the capital of India?

What function does the diaphragm serve?

What popular plant has strains called White Widow and Blue Dream?

When this popular Parisian writer died, the brothels in France were closed down so that the employees could attend the funeral.

What does Nova Scotia mean in English?

Caesar proclaimed “vino, vidi, vici!” What does it mean?

Betty came over Thursday night for dinner and to watch Lessons in Chemistry. I’m enjoying it just as much, if not more than, the book. This is another example of how neurodivergent people don’t play silly emotional games when getting to know each other. Great acting. Beautiful costumes, cars and set designs from the ’50s.

Yesterday Barbara picked me up at 8:30 and we went to Debra’s new apartment. She is renting a super-cute upstairs casita from another Barb and her husband, Stefan. We walked a 7-mile loop in Palo Alto, where Deb’s place is. We stopped in town to pick up a baguette and then had lunch at Deb’s. She made a beautiful salad with roasted sweet potatoes and fresh greens from Pascal’s farm. Pascal is Deb’s “partner.” He has a farm up in the hills somewhere. The house is tiny, and his brother and girlfriend are visiting, so Debra decided to find another place to live. Barb offered her the upstairs casita. It’s working out great for both of them. Sounds like it may become a long-term thing. Deb, Barbara and I have also been toying with the idea of renting a house when I come next year. As much as I love the place I’m in, I’m just feeling a little bit trapped by the hill.

Barb came up to join us after her PT appointment for her knee. Barb is a “wild child.” She goes out dancing three to four times a week. She was very happy to have lunch with us yesterday, said she doesn’t do it enough, and so proclaimed that we will plan to have a potluck one day next week. I’m in!

Here are the answers:

What is the capital of India? New Delhi.

What function does the diaphragm serve? Respiration/breathing.

What popular plant has strains called White Widow and Blue Dream? Marijuana.

When this popular Parisian writer died, the brothels in France were closed down so that the employees could attend the funeral. Victor Hugo.

What does Nova Scotia mean in English? New Scotland.

Caesar proclaimed “vino, vidi, vici!” What does it mean? “I came, I saw, I conquered!”

Can’t believe I’ve been here for two months already. I’ve been so busy with the book, the auction, studying Spanish and calligraphy that I have spent zero time on making cards, one of my favorite things. So, the 31st is the end of taking in donations for the auction, and then it’s all pretty much automated until the very end when I do the wrap-up. Then I’ll have more play time.

Barb is planning an outing for us for Feb. 19-22 in the Mount Totumas Cloud Forest. Should be fun.

https://www.mounttotumas.com

I did go out for lunch last week with Barb and Sally. We were going to go to Patrón de Shwarma, but they were closed. Instead, we went to Taco Rudo’s across the street. It was excellent!

On Friday, I was supposed to go to the other Israeli restaurant, Baras, with Betty. Unfortunately, Betty was in an accident with a motorcycle, and she was unable to drive her car. Instead, she came here, and I made dinner, which I took upstairs. I made a chicken-mushroom risotto and a broccoli-cauliflower side dish. Jerry made an excellent apple pie, which I had for breakfast the next morning. Thanks Jerry! This morning he brought me a couple of cinnamon raisin buns, which I had for this morning’s breakfast. I know, not very healthy, but what the heck!

I’ve started a new workout program called Tapp Brothers Primal Movements.

Programs

I like it for a number of reasons. One is that it is a structured, long-term program that begins at a very basic level. Even at this beginner level, I can feel changes the next day, so I know something is happening. Also, it’s nice and slow. The movements are all about control. I didn’t realize that primal movement was a new movement in the physical training industry. I just sort of happened upon this. The other thing I love is that it is only 30 minutes a day, which is very doable for me. If it gets too much longer than that, I make excuses. AND, I don’t have to go anywhere.

Still trying to get some feedback on my calligraphy. Ash said he would do it, but he is MIA. I just emailed another calligraphy site called INKEMETHIS Calligraphy and Engraving. They have lots of teachers and classes. I asked if there is someone who can just give feedback. I’m on a FB group, and I post my practice there, but the comments are not really helpful. So, we’ll see. Looks like I also need help with spelling. 🙂

Yes, the same moon, but apparently my friends and family at home can’t see it because of their cloudy skies. Wish I could get a better photo.

I’ve been knee deep in working on our church auction. Some very cool things are coming in. Take a look. https://new.biddingowl.com/LCUUCAUCTION2024

Kathy, check out the mandalas. They are amazing! I would love to learn how to make them. When I’m not doing calligraphy, that is…

I made a bit of progress over the past two days. I’ve received some very good recommendations from members on the Copperplate Script for All Facebook Group. I was pointed in the direction of Instagram, where I found the most popular teachers of Engrosser’s Script, which is what I practice. I’ve never really understood Instagram, but this was a very good experience. And so was this:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Casey Abrams (@caseybassy)

I just saw this posting from one of the calligraphy teachers:

I have no excuse.

There are two new Israeli restaurants in Boquete, and it turns out that I am going to be trying them both out: tomorrow for lunch and Friday for dinner. Tomorrow is Patrón de Shwarma with Barbara and Sally, and then Friday dinner at Baras with Betty, after which we will come here and start watching Lessons in Chemistry. I feel like I’ve been hold up here for a while. Time to get out and socialize.

Kathie’s husband, Michael, is doing better. He is being moved from ICU to Critical Care. Sounds like things are improving, but Kathie won’t know for a while. He was actually hit and then run over by the car, moving at 20 mph. Can’t imagine.

My writing is going better than expected on the second draft. I exercised a lot of avoidance behavior before I actually sat down and started working on it, but I spent most of Saturday and Sunday on pulling apart the Preface and Introduction and putting them back together again. That felt very good. I’ve also noticed that I find it easier to stick to the writing if I sit on the couch instead of the kitchen chair. The couch is much more comfortable, and I don’t feel the need to get up and walk about so often. That may not be good for my body, but it’s great for my brain. In any event, if feels easier, and doesn’t feel so arduous.

The rainbows never get old. This one I would rate about a 7.5. I have seen even brighter and will capture if I can. The rainbow always shows up right outside the windows that I face most of the day (it is actually what I’m looking at as I write this), so I can get them right away.

My sleep is still an issue, and frankly, I think it always will be. I am occasionally able to fall asleep without Ambien, but that is only if I had a terrible night the night before, sleeping perhaps four hours. I think I’m done with this. I feel so awful when I don’t sleep, and I have too much that I want to accomplish during the day to accept this. My latest MO is to go to bed when I’m sleepy, and if I’m not asleep in half an hour, I take a tiny nibble of an Ambien, which is about 1-2 mg. It works. And I’m not writing about it anymore. This will only ever be an issue if my doctor refuses to refill my prescription, which will not happen for a long time. One prescription lasts me over a year. Personally, I do not feel that I am at risk taking the Ambien. I do feel that not taking it is a bigger risk. Okay, done.

I’ve lucked out with Jerry as a landlord because he also likes to bake and distribute. Such a great trait in a friend. Yesterday he brought me these citrus cookies. They remind me of the lemon-ricotta ones I make. Thanks, Jerry.

Okay, back to work. It’s auction time at my church, and I’m responsible for entering the donations. Yesterday was Sunday, so I think people were reminded of the auction when they were at church. The donations are coming in. BiddingOwl has upgraded their platform, so I’m happy that I started early in order to get used to it. I’m finding a number of helpful new features.

I’m not as pleased with my Zoom account right now. For some reason, I can no longer access my account on my Mac. I’m happy that I discovered this a couple of days ago, so that I was able to put into place an alternative method for a class I’m facilitating this evening. I can access Zoom on my phone, and I’ll try FaceTime if that doesn’t work. I most always love technology, but there are always these challenges that spring up from time to time.

I had to laugh last night after I posted my calligraphy practice to the Facebook group.

A member commented: … there is actually no loop “d” minuscule (both in Engrossers and English roundhand). I’m just a clueless novice, but I had to point that out because you want to take a proficiency test.”

My reply: LOL!! I think what you are seeing as a loop “d” is actually a “c” and an “l” that are not spaced properly. It is way past my bedtime, and I was too tired to redo it. Maybe tomorrow. That was almost 1:00 a.m., and I STILL couldn’t fall asleep.

I woke this morning (finally) thinking I was going to blog something about the horrific night I had and the worst nightmare of my life that should probably be made into a book. Then reality started to set in, and that ridiculous thought was abandoned when I read my first email from my editor saying that her husband was hit by a car while crossing the street and was now in ICU with skull and vertebral fractures, which apparently is only the beginning of the story. I was hoping it was still part of my own nightmare, but it’s not. My heart goes out to you, Kathie.

So, as you can see my sleep is still not ideal. I didn’t go to bed until nearly 11. Yes, I felt sleepy, but once my head hit the pillow – nothing. I waited a couple of hours. I know that lying in bed awake is not following the rules. Experts say that if you are not asleep in half an hour, to get up and do something you enjoy. My brain says, “NO!! I’m here and I don’t want to get up! I want some sleep, Goddamit!!” So, I took half of a Kirkland Sleep Aid (diphenhydramine) that Kathy brought down for me. I fell asleep, but, as I said, I found myself in the depths of a horrible nightmare. I forced myself awake at one point, sat up and tried to stay awake, but I failed and re-entered the same nightmare – twice! I sit here now, at 11:15 am, still groggy and admonishing myself that I must return to playing by the rules.

I’ve also been thinking about what Tolle and Spira say about sleep and the longing to fall into its sweet embrace. It’s like a break we get from the work of thinking and perceiving.

Spira says sleep is like the lens of a camera that loses focus. When we are awake the lens is acutely focused on experiences and perceptions. When we are asleep the lens is allowed to relax and lose focus, only to return to acuity in its next cycling. In deep sleep there is an absence of thought and therefore an absence of ego, just pure consciousness.

Deep sleep is not the absence of awareness; it is the awareness of absence. Awareness (consciousness) is always present, always aware. I find it ironic that in deep sleep we are pure consciousness, whereas by traditional terms we would be said to be unconscious.

I must post an edit to my blog from yesterday. I said that someone was ostracized from “the gang.” I have discovered that this is not true. As with most conflicts in relationships, it is messier than that. I know I can’t fix it. It is best for me to bow out. I am a firm believer that the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and I don’t want to get myself sick over this. I can only hope that love wins.

As I was sitting at my kitchen table, engrossed in my writing this morning, I chanced to look up at one point and noticed that the air in front of me, in my bedroom, was filled with smoke. I thought it was coming in through the open door at the end of my bed. Wasn’t I surprised to discover that it was actually coming from a pot of beans I had forgotten on the stove – a stove which is fewer than 10 feet BEHIND me! I jumped up, turned off the beans, turned on the fans and messaged Jerry that the smoke alarm wasn’t working. He came down immediately and checked the alarm, only to find that it was working. That surprised me, but he said it was probably because the smoke wasn’t thick enough.

Jerry said that he smelled the beans upstairs in his house and thought that someone was roasting coffee. I am now pretty much convinced that my sense of smell has been compromised by my three bouts with Covid. Thank goodness nothing more than the saucepan was affected.

Now that my Las Lajas holiday is over, I’m getting back to my schedule here. I’ve started the second draft of the Camino book. I asked Kathie if we could hold off until 1/26 so that I can get it as organized as possible before submitting re-writes. It doesn’t ALL have to be rewritten, but Kathie and I have discussed certain points that would do well with more elaboration. So, as the above paragraphs reveal – I’m hard at it.

I’ve also set up a few play dates and lunches with friends. So I have more fun to look forward to. I’m also looking forward to one more trip to Las Lajas. I was hoping to say “with the gang,” but I’m not sure that will happen. Unfortunately, being an “outsider,” there’s not much I can do about that – other than be very, very sad. It’s hard being part of a group when one person has been ostracized.

I’ve been receiving photos from home recently from friends and family convincing me that I’m really “missing out” on some great Wisconsin weather. Right… After about 15+ inches of snow they are now enjoying temperatures of -10 with windchills of -21.

No, thanks. I’m good. I’m still in a T-shirt, shorts and sandals, and I didn’t have to shovel this morning.

I do, however, miss the Packer parties – not the Packers, just the parties…

When I was at Bulk Organics recently I purchased this jar of jam, which was made by one of the employees. She gave me a sample on a cracker, and I loved it. It is fabulous on my asiago-jalapeño and cream cheese bagel.

So, what is saril? I had no idea, but Wikipedia did.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roselle_(plant)#:~:text=Roselle%20is%20known%20as%20saril,as%20Gwozey%2Dpéi%20in%20Creole.

I’m surprised I never heard of it; it’s so ubiquitous. It’s also called Roselle and is a hibiscus.

I spent my calligraphy time yesterday writing the names of the wait and bar staff at Las Lajas. I’m going to make them name tags, which I hope to take with me on a return visit.

Elmer?